Chapter 18

FLASHBACK-POV None

Faith squinted, the sun being a little brighter than she cared seeing. Why does my head always feel like I've been lobotomized, she thought. Lobotomized – there's a good idea.

She looked around the motel room. Where the hell was she? The clock on the dilapidated nightstand was telling her it was close to noon. She had no idea how long she had slept. Shaking her hair away from her shoulders, she got up from bed and moved to close the window shades.

It had been two years. Two years of running. Where to? She had no idea. Who from? Of course that was a question that didn't need asking. Before she had left, she had told Buffy about her life before Sunnydale. Not all of it, cause shit, B didn't need to know all of that, did she? Faith had no intention of bursting the bubble Buffy had come to know. Even after all the things she had seen, Buffy still had no idea that people like Faith were a dime a dozen. And why would she tell her?

But she had told her about other things. Traveling around, going from town to town. She lay back on the bed and remembered a conversation where she and B had discussed the necessity of sleazy motel rooms much like the one she currently inhabited.

"They're not all bad," she had told her. "In fact, they sure the hell beat living on the fucking street."

Buffy had shaken her head. "I wish you never had to do that. I can't imagine."

Faith had sighed, brushing a dark lock away from her face. She scowled a bit. "Yeah, well…you get used to anything. I mean I slept in other places. Bus stations, storage rooms, abandoned buildings. But you know…you have to be careful. People don't particularly care about whether you live or die."

Buffy had smiled at her, "But you're a slayer."

Faith had shook her head, "I haven't always been."

"Well…before that though, you like had your mom and stuff, right?"

Faith had wanted to laugh. Right. Her mom. That was too fucking funny. The only thing her mom had done for her was give her life. A crappy, fucked up, disgusting…ok, don't want to go there. Instead, Faith had just nodded at her. "Yeah." She agreed.

"You know…I mean I never asked…but how did you pay? For the rooms and stuff?" Buffy had looked thoughtful for a moment. "And food? And clothes? Cause leather pants, not cheap. Nor were they really comfortable, mind you. But I guess that's a whole different question." She had smiled at Faith.

It had made Faith's heart stop. Not the question. Buffy's smile. Should she tell her? "I had money." Yeah she had had money all right.

"Well, I figured as much, silly." Buffy had swatted her on the arm. "I meant where did you get it? It didn't just fall in your lap did it?"

Faith had closed her eyes. At this point she had taken her fingers and began massaging her temples. When she opened her eyes, she had seen Buffy staring at her. An inquisitive look crossing her face. "Well," she had not wanted to answer the question. "Well…I guess I stole it. Mostly."

"Stole it?!?" Faith could not help but notice the surprise that had crossed Buffy's face. Surprise mixed with…she couldn't decide…disgust, maybe?

It had given Faith cause to get a little angry. She jumped up. "Yeah, B. Fuck. My life wasn't all cute little boyfriends and stupid high school proms. I had to fucking survive. I tried not steal from anyone who didn't…well…who wasn't bad. Cause trust me," she had sighed, a little wearier than when she had started the conversation, "there were a lot of bad people out there. And all those fuckers…man, I'd be like 'shit look at all this damn stuff.' Materialistic bastards. So yeah, I stole. What the hell else could I do, apply for a job? I tried that shit. It wasn't like they were keen on hiring someone fifteen with no address, no respectable clothing, and no parents. Fuck, I had to eat."

Buffy had seemed a little hurt. Faith didn't know if it was from her outburst or her memories. "I didn't know." She replied, a little stunned.

Faith knew she shouldn't get angry. But she had not been able to help herself. Years on the street had also done that to her. "Well of course you fucking didn't know! You didn't ask! No one ever asked. Not you, not your friends, not your watcher. You were too wrapped up in your own goddamned lives to think about whether or not I had anything to eat," She crossed the floor back to her girlfriend. She had noticed Buffy's face. Pity, fuck, she had thought, that's not what I fucking wanted. "Don't go getting all emotional about it. It was what it was. Nothing any of you could have really done anyway. I mean…it's not like I blame you all or anything." She lowered her voice with the last statement.

Buffy had turned her head. Ashamed. " I should have asked."

Faith took a deep breath. "Yeah, B, you probably should have." She heard the first hitch of Buffy's voice and shook her head quickly. "I mean…we all should have done a lot of things. Don't ya think? I shouldn't have been so fucking proud. We were stupid…so what? It's not like it matters anymore, anyway."

Buffy had turned back around and looked at Faith. "That's stupid." Faith had cocked an eyebrow at that statement. Buffy quickly backtracked. "Not you." She shook her head, "I didn't mean your stupid. I just meant we should have asked. It does matter. It would have…I could have…I am such a moron."

Faith had wrapped her arms around Buffy at that moment, pulling the smaller girl to her. "Nah." She laughed, "You were a teenage girl. With the unfortunate task of saving the world. I kinda get why you had other things on your mind." And maybe Faith didn't even believe what she was saying. But that had not mattered. She didn't want Buffy to suffer. She never wanted to hurt her again.

Buffy was trying not to cry into Faith's chest. She had shaken her head back and forth, a sob choking in her throat. "No. No. No." She had said. "I should have known. I was so selfish. God, I'm still so selfish. I'm sorry." She looked at Faith, "Do you know that?" Faith had nodded down at her. She had snuggled herself back against the brunette, "I promise. As long as I live, you will never have to do that again."

Faith had not said anything. She didn't like promises. Never had. Because in her experience, once a promise was made, the powers that be would do nothing at stopping to make sure that it was broken.


Faith ran her fingers through her hair and got up from the bed. She had forgotten about the promise. Two and a half years after that very promise, she found herself sitting in a sleazy motel room outside of Boulder. She had not told B about the other things she did for money. Things, even now, she couldn't even think about without shuddering. Gathering some clothes she moved into the bathroom. And there were worse things she could have done. Would never do. She remembered how many times she'd gone hungry because she wouldn't do those things. Placing her things on the grimy counter, she looked at herself in the mirror.

How the hell had she gotten here? Her money was close to running out yet again. She was sick of having to find odd jobs. She focused on the circles under her eyes. They were getting darker, even though, she figured she had slept for at least fifteen hours.

She placed the tablet the witch in San Diego had given her. "Take one every morning. Don't forget. Otherwise, they will be able to track you. Remember."

Faith could have slapped herself. Sleeping so damn long. She rolled her eyes at herself in the mirror. Like they are still looking for you. Dumbass. Still, she didn't like the idea of missing the pill. She quickly placed it under her tongue. The slight grimace it had used to cause as the taste that she could only describe as rotten meat had been released kept itself from her face now. She was used to it. Hell, given time Faithie here could get used to anything.

She moved to turn on the shower behind her. She bent down, taking off her underwear. Her only sleeping attire. She hoped that this fleabag motel at least had enough hot water to last the shower. She grabbed her bag. The motel had soap. Even shampoo. But she had learned her lesson there. The stuff was like cooking fat and there was no way it was ever getting on her body again. On second thought, she had thought to herself, guess I can't get used to everything.

After showering she felt much better. Going through her clothes she found what she was looking for. It was the hottest outfit she had. The top was tight, too tight she had to admit, but black…somewhat like a corset. But it tied in the front. She liked the way it looked on her. The way her breasts spilled out of the top of it. Her pants were red leather. Tight in all the right places, she had worked for two weeks just to purchase them. It was stupid. Impetuous. But they were about to pay off.

Cause Faith was on the prowl. Tonight was the last night she was sleeping in a dirty motel room, she promised herself. The powers that fucked up her life had given her one thing. It was her saving grace. And tonight, goddamnit she was gonna use it.

She sat down on the bed and lit a smoke. She decided to order a pizza. It was a while until dark. Kicking back on her bed, she put one hand behind her head and took a drag off of her cigarette. It was a cheap brand. And she had to make herself not wince at the aftertaste. Fuck it, she thought, taking a drag. I'm not going to buy cheap cigs. I'm not going to buy cheap anything ever again.

She closed her eyes and smiled to herself. I deserve some shit, goddamnit. I've been fighting the good fucking fight while most of the rest of humanity went about their goddamn daily lives. I'm taking back what's mine.

And then, almost as an afterthought, she smiled to herself, "And fuck, if I don't need some pussy." She laughed out loud.

Buffy's POV

She called her mom. I was surprised. I don't know why. I knew she would always take to Faith, given the chance. Faith was also a little right. I was a tad jealous. How could I not be? They were so much alike. Faith had not even been here for…ok, I'm not going to go through that again. Stop being so stupid, Buffy.

And then this shit. Fucking Angel and Faith. What the hell was wrong with them? I felt like there was something going on that I didn't know about. Either way, I didn't like the way they were baiting each other. I had even began to agree with Angel's logic until his little 'I'm badder than you are' staring contest they had. Could I not just get through one damn day without someone becoming homicidal? That's a reasonable request, isn't it?

Angel had walked back to his office. He left his door open. Kinda like saying, 'come on back in.' Yeah, well fuck you. I'm not going to talk to either of them right now. Not about any of this crap. Let 'em fight.

I followed where the girls had gone into the back room. Everyone was in there.

Faith was telling them a story. I had just caught the tail end of it. "So she pretty much kicked my ass." She has no idea how to censor her mouth.

Annie nodded up to the rest of them, "Yep. I kicked her ass."

They laughed. Willow, of course, at least tried to be responsible. "That's a bad word Ann," she said.

"Ahem…" I cleared my throat. Hello! I'm in the room. Doesn't anyone see me?

"Buff," Xander exclaimed. "What's up?" Yeah, don't try to cover for the little monster. I heard her.

"Annie, we do not say the word ass," I said, moving closer to them.

"Uh…yeah you do. All the time."

Why did I conceive of a child who's sole mission in life was to argue with me? I rolled my eyes. "Ok, let's try that again. You do not say ass."

She crossed her arms. Oh, get all huffy. "That's not fair." She frowned.

"Yeah, well sucks to be you, I guess," I grinned at her.

She stuck her tongue out at me. But she was smiling.

Cordelia spoke up, "So Buffy. Annie and Faith here were just regaling us with the story of Faith's somewhat sad ass-kicking at the hands of a five-year-old."

I laughed, "I probably should have told you that." I said to Faith.

Faith didn't look at me for a moment. Shit, she was pissed. Well, duh, Buffy, I thought. Of course she's pissed. She was listening to you and Angel.

She finally spoke, "Probably would have come in handy."

Cordelia rolled her eyes at Kennedy and Dawn, "You know they could have solved this little problem here."

Dawn agreed. "Yeah. You'd think they'd have already discussed it. It's pertinent information. Annie's a lethal weapon." Why do they always taunt me? Do they have nothing better to do with their time? Of course not.

"Communication 101," Cordy looked at us, "Not a difficult task to master. I know Faith didn't go to college, but you did," she said looking at me now, "and I bet even before you dropped out, you took that course. Of course, if you were anything like you were in high school, well…we all know how those classes turned out for you."

Annie smiled, "How's that?"

Xander piped in, "Hey don't pick on those of us in the 'less than perfect academically' category. It's hard being a genius's friend. Right, Buff?"

I nodded, "Yeah, Willow was always like…one upping us and stuff."

Willow threw me a look. "Hey that's not true. I can't help it if the two of you were academically deficient."

Cordy rolled her eyes, "Deficient implies that they were just lacking a little something. All I remember is Buffy here blowing things up. And staking things. And generally just putting my life in danger whenever I happened to walk by her. I'm surprised she even found her way to class. That is, when she bothered to show up."

What the hell is this? Pick on Buffy day. Dawn nodded. "That was cool. That gym here in LA and then the whole school. You were the coolest sister ever the day you blew up the school," she sighed blissfully, "oh the memories of leveled schools. Does a heart good."

Leave it to my baby sister to get excited about the destruction of public property. Ok, I have to admit. It was pretty cool. But that's me, coolest person in this room, that's for damn sure.

Faith was watching our little exchange. "Nothing changes here," she smiled slightly. There's my girl.

I grinned back at her, "We are still as boring as ever."

Willow scoffed, "I am so not boring." Cordelia raised an eyebrow at her. She turned, "What?" She asked her. "I'm not."

Shouldn't have said that Wills. "You are joking, aren't you? You may not be bored…I mean even as loud as Annie and I here turn up the TV, well the horrifying nightmares the two of us have are proof of that. But nobody's throwing any of you a party for being 'Stimulating Person of the Year.'"

Xander smirked, "Oh, cause you are so exciting. I forgot how biting sarcasm qualifies YOU for that award."

"First of all, not biting sarcasm. It's the truth. I know it hurts, but so does your constant whining, and I seem to get over that. Second – I am exciting. Ask Annie."

Annie was watching the conversation, the way she watched all of our conversations. With a look of awe and a little disbelief. Come to think of it, so was Faith. "Yep," Annie nodded. "Cordy's exciting." Cordy nodded at her, waving her hand at her, encouraging her to go on, "And smart. And funny. And way hotter than Dawn."

"Hey," Dawn said.

Annie just looked at her and shrugged her shoulders.

Willow frowned at Cordy, "You know, you can't count that. It doesn't count if you tell her what to say."

Cordy looked appalled. "I do not tell her what to say. I can't help it if you guys are jealous. Or that Annie has more perception in her little toe than the rest of you have in your whole body. She knows I'm strikingly special."

Annie nodded, not even looking at Cordelia, "It's the truth. She even taught me a song about it. It's called 'Me and Cordy are the Coolest Chicks in the World.'" She looked at Faith, "Want me to sing it?"

Faith nodded. Cordelia jumped up and put her hand over Annie's mouth. "Kids…" she laughed nervously, "making up things all of the time." She looked down at Annie. Safe to say a look of 'what the hell are you doing?' crossed her face. "Eww…gross."

Annie was giggling at her. "I licked your hand."

"Well, duh." Cordy wiped it on her pants. She smiled at her. "Don't start picking up Faith's bad habits. I don't have time to reprogram you."

"Huh? I ain't licking your hand." Faith said.

"That's because I don't let you," a look of exasperation crossed her face. Like she couldn't believe the stupidity of the rest of us.

I have to admit she loves Annie. That's the only reason I don't kick her ignorant ass all the way back to the pit that used to be Sunnydale.

I sat down next to Faith and took her hand. She smiled weakly at me. I saw Kennedy roll her eyes a little bit, but she refrained from saying anything. In fact, she was even smiling.

Faith squeezed my hands. The rest of them had gone back to whatever it was they were doing. Cordy and Xander were playing pool. Will he never learn? Kennedy and Willow were looking at some book behind the bar. Leaning into each other. Dawn was filing her nails and looking around the room. Probably for Andrew. He'd been gone all morning. She was antsy. If she didn't get to inflict some sort of torture on, and I hesitate to call him this, the poor boy, by lunch she'll be unbearable. She has an incredible large mean streak in her.

"She called me Mom," Faith whispered in my ear.

I nodded, "I know." I whispered back.

I looked to Annie. She was sitting on the bar, facing Willow and Ken. "Teach me another spell." Huh?

Willow looked to us quickly. I raised my eyebrow at her. She turned back to Annie, "Hey we didn't teach you a spell…" she was fumbling with her words. She looked at me, "Cordy's right…kids." She said. I saw her make a face at Annie.

Annie whispered. Umm hello, slayer hearing. Remember guys? "Whoops. I forgot."

Great. I feel secure in the knowledge that everyone was teaching my child the valuable lesson of lying to get out of trouble. I'm sure that will serve to make my life as a mother much more entertaining.

                                                               **********

Faith was still holding my hand. Running her fingers inside my palm. We were watching something on television. I don't even know what it was. Some damn movie about vampires. This shit makes us irate.

"I hate vampire movies," I said to Faith. "I mean…why don't they call me? Those guys aren't even scary. And they're cute. Why are they cute?"

Faith shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe they think their thrall will be more attractive if they can get the hotties or something."

"Well that is ridiculous. Why would they think that is a good idea? I mean this vampire is a rocker for god's sake. Please. Flying all over the place. They wish they could fly."

Faith laughed, "I'm pretty glad they don't. Cause that is a skill that I don't have."

I couldn't resist. So sue me, I've got a mean streak too. "I can make you fly."

She looked at me for a moment, and then realization crossed her face. She groaned. "You can't say things like that in here. There are people around. Like our daughter."

"Where's that self-control I know you have, Faithie?" I taunted her.

She turned and whispered in my ear again. "I bet I have more self-control than you," she purred, licking my ear.

She so cannot do that. Our kid is in here for Christ's sake. "Hey," I said, smacking her on the arm.

She laughed smugly, "I'm just saying."

I turned around and crossed my arms. "Whatever," I tried to frown. "We'll see."

She was about to make another witty comeback I imagine, when she shifted. I felt it too. Tingling. So did Kennedy, who looked up from the book. And Annie, who turned around. Angel. Our vampire senses always on alert. That's why I don't know how he sneaks up on us sometimes. I wonder if he can turn it off.

Ok. So not the point. He walked into the room. Again, the indifference was…well, creepy. Both he and Faith seem to have it when they are around each other.

Faith immediately tensed. She held his stare. There was no one else in the room to either of them. All that existed was this…I don't know…tension. I found myself again wondering what had happened between them.

Cordelia broke the silence, "if you two are going to insist on acting like dogs fighting over the same Buffy bone, you might want to take it outside. It gets on my nerves." She made a head motion at Annie.

She was right. They needed to stop this. "Guys…" I started, "you need to…"

"Faith?" Angel asked her, he interrupted me. Hello! Still in the room! He turned to walk out.

She just nodded. She didn't even look at me, "Yeah." She had answered him. And then got up and followed him out. Well if the two of them are fighting over me, they sure as hell don't pay me very much attention.

A vacation. I'm thinking a vacation would be nice. Preferably one in the sun. Faith's pasty ass can get burned and Angel can get dusted, and I can work on my tan. Dumbasses, I thought, getting up to fucking follow them. Yet again.

Chapter 19

Faith's POV

Bout fucking time this shit goes down. I'm just about sick of all of Angel's bullshit.

I followed him into his office. Well, we sure as hell can't fight in there. I guess we can actually, but make more sense to fight outside or in the foyer.

He's looking at me with that firmness that just pisses me the fuck off. "Are you coming or not?" Oh, how do you love that dramatic sigh he's got? Fucker can't even breathe.

"Whatever," I snap, following him inside. I didn't get as close to him as I could have. I wanted to anticipate his move. My body was coiled.

"I don't want to fight you Faith," again with the sigh.

"Could have fooled the hell out of me," I told him, not releasing my stance. "Seems all you've wanted to do since I got here was fight."

"You haven't been exactly personable," He growled. He's like a petulant child. Jeez. Whine much?

"What do you expect?" I tried not to get to loud. I knew the others were in the other room. "You act like…well like a baby. Moping around this fucking hotel." I backed off. Just a little. "I know why you don't want me here. You fucking think I'm an idiot? Pining all over this hotel cause you can't get into Buffy's pants." I ran a hand through my hair, "And I never told her. That's what it is, isn't it? You are afraid I am going to say something aren't you?"

He smirked, "Aren't you? I wasn't the only one there that night."

I shook my head. "Fuck you."

Hell, three years ago. It was the night I'd fucking decided to leave those sleazy motels and never ever return. I don't know why I'd forgotten about the pill. I was an idiot.

"Faith," he had breathed my name out. Almost a whisper, across the smoky bar. Even from across the room I'd heard him.

I had turned slowly. Just in time to see him coming. He was walking with a purpose, not letting one goddamn emotion pass his fucking face. I, on the other hand, was furious.

I had put my cigarette out. And removed the woman's hand from my thigh. "Wait here." I spoke with a harshness that I'd missed. No question there who was in charge.

She took a ragged breath. Yeah, she liked it. I had picked her for a reason.

It had taken me all night to single her out. Four bars and three hours later and I knew she was the one. Designer shoes, designer jewelry, and a designer girlfriend. I'd gotten rid of the last one pretty quickly.

I walked up to him. Meeting him half way. "Soul boy."

He had nodded at me and motioned with his head to the couch on the other side of the room. We walked over to the seat just as someone was sitting down. "Get the fuck up," I said. He scurried off. Yep, I had still had it. I had turned to him. "I'd ask how you knew I was here, but I already know. So why don't we get this over with? Cause truthfully, I had quite a catch over there. Rich and reasonably hot. Terribly hard to come by."

He wasn't taking the bait. Always sighing, this motherfucker. "Not here to fight with you."

"Well, that's good. Cause I don't have time for that." I had motioned with my head to the girl from earlier.

"Yes Faith. You've made it quite clear that you plan on snagging that woman over there." He'd answered.

"Well. Now that you know I'm not coming back. You can tell B. I can't fucking believe she sent you of all people anyway." I had shaken my head. "She can't do anything for herself."

"Quit being so arrogant. She doesn't know I'm here. And if I have anything to do with it, she never will." He'd answered me with an uncharacteristic flash of anger. "We've been looking for you for over two years. Even after she thought we had stopped. The coven contacted Giles this morning. And I came. No one else knows I'm here." He looked at his hands, "Lots of things have changed at that hotel."

"Yeah, well, fuck you…I don't care. It's not my business anymore. I'm getting on with my life."

Angel had looked around the bar. "Yeah Faith. You are the poster girl for 'all together.'"

"Again I say…fuck you." He had always made me so angry when he wanted. Fucking pushing buttons like he was some kind of…well, button pusher. "You have no right to come in here and judge me."

"Oh please, I didn't come here to judge you. One reason I came here was to see that you are ok." He looked at me, "Got that answer pretty quickly." He had paused, "Why are you doing this? Don't you even want to know how everyone is? How she is?"

And in the end that had always been it. Buffy. The one thing that would haunt me and the big Brood the rest of our lives. For him, that must seem like one hell of a long time.

"I'm through with all of this. She wasn't the only one hurting. All any of you ever cared about was her."

He had sighed, well there's a shocker. This fucker sure did sigh a lot for a dead guy. "And was it a competition Faith? Cause I didn't know you were collecting who loves who points? And if I'm not mistaken, you were at the front of the I love Buffy line."

I had tensed. "I was at the front. You're right about that. But I'm not anymore. I don't care."

The woman from earlier had picked that moment to walk up. "Faith?" Fuck, didn't I tell her to wait.

Decision time. I had looked to him. He had spoken as I rose. "Faith, don't do this. You don't understand. There's things…things you need to know."

Fuck him. It had been over two years. I couldn't see her again. She…I just couldn't. Fuck the whole thing. I hadn't made it that far for nothing. "Sorry Angel." I had said, following the woman out of the bar.

Truthfully, I had expected him to follow me out. Had almost wished he would. But he didn't. He didn't even move.


He shook his head when I'd said 'fuck you.' And then got that smug look back. I was quickly getting scared that B was outside of the office. She could be, couldn't she? She didn't need…I didn't want her…oh fuck, I don't even know anymore.

Angel shrugged his shoulders and walked to his desk. Thinking better of sitting down I guess, he rose at the last minute and started pacing. "I don't want to kick your ass now," He said. Well thanks for the fucking info. "But I could've kicked your ass that night."

"Back at ya." Couldn't say I didn't want to kick his ass now, though. He stopped pacing. I started. "You could have told me."

"You didn't want to hear anything," he said from behind me.

I spun on him. "Please Angel. I would have wanted to know that. Jesus, what do you think of me?" Asshole.

"I don't know Faith. What do you think I think of you? That you are pigheaded? Yeah. That you are spoiled? Yeah. That you are way too concerned about yourself to even see the people in front of you? Yeah," he nodded, "some of the time, yeah. So so proud that…you wouldn't even listen."

"Fuck you. You knew I would have listened to that. Knew I would have reacted."

"And how would you have reacted? Huh? Ever think about that?"

"I would have come back here. I would have…I would have fixed all of this."

He paced. "Don't lie to me. You didn't even believe Buffy was being faithful when you left. Didn't wait for her to explain. Didn't do anything but throw a fit and walk out. If I had told you about her, you would have thought that Buffy had been cheating on you. You would have never believed me. You know that."

I slammed my hands on the desk, "I don't know anything! How do you know how I would've reacted." I was screaming and yet I couldn't help it. "You didn't give me a chance." I lunged at him. He caught my arms, and I kicked him. "You weren't supposed to decide. You're not God."

He swung at me connecting with my left cheek. Fuck a motherfucker, that hurt. I grabbed him, pushing him against the wall. He shoved me back and jumped on me.

And was immediately pulled off. B.

"Get the fuck up! Both of you! Now!" She grabbed me and pulled me into a standing position, only to shove me to one side of the room. She turned and shoved Angel to the other.

Neither one of us spoke, watching her. I knew that she had heard what we were talking about. We were both stupid if we thought she hadn't. "Buffy," I tried.

She swung around. "No!" Um, ok. Shutting up. "Neither one of you need to say a word. And before you ask, I heard you. If you got a problem with that, take your little catfights outside next time."

"Buffy, I can explain…" Bad move, big boy.

She spun the other way, "Are you fucking listening to me!?! Shut up!" Her voice was getting pretty loud. She moved to sit on his desk, looking at both of us back and forth. Finally she looked down at the ground. "At least I know what all this crap was about. I don't even know what to think about it. Seems to me both of you were a little stupid. And selfish. And…stupid." Probably wasn't the time to point out that she had just said that. "Why do you think you always have to protect me?" Her voice was weak.

Were we supposed to answer that? Cause not really looking to get my head beat in here. I looked at Angel. He shrugged. Guess he was feeling the same way.

She raised her head quickly, "Do either of you have something to say for yourselves?"

Both of us shook our heads. Umm nope, not me. Broody boy? He was going with the big no too. Smarter than I gave him credit for.

She sighed. "The stupidest part of this whole thing is that the two of you were each other's saviors. Isn't that right?" A rhetorical question. We stayed silent. "And you let petty jealousy come between you. Or was it me? It's always me, isn't it?" She began to cry but we didn't move.

She just shook her head and looked to the door. I heard it that time. Fuck if those idiots were not outside.

She rolled her eyes. "Open the door. We know you're out there."

Well lookie here, here comes the pussy parade. Yipee.

Buffy's POV

I'd heard the door. Guess they were all out there by now.

"Open the door. We know you're out there."

We waited a few moments. I heard Cordy, "move I'll open it."

They were all standing there. Except Annie. Where was she? Faith asked my question.

"Where's Annie?"

Dawn answered. "With Andrew. Not that any of you seem to care."

I sighed, "don't start that shit Dawnie."

"Oh, shut the fuck up Buffy." What the fuck? Who does Kennedy think she is? I looked to Willow to see if she'd stopped her. She hadn't even flinched. She looked pissed. In fact, all of them looked pissed. "Dawn's right. You don't care. So when the stupid shouting began," she looked from Faith to Angel. "Which, we all heard by the way, Andrew offered to take her across the street to get some ice cream. Seemed like a good idea at the time."

I was about to say something and Willow moved. "Don't even think about it Buffy."

"This doesn't concern you, Wills."

Xander snickered. "Give me a break Buff. It is too bad that we are not good enough to be involved in your pity fests." He said, mockingly.

Angel spoke up, "Guys maybe you…"

Xander spun on him, "no you shut up too!" Whoa that was kinda scary. He looked to Faith. She shrugged, not saying anything. Apparently that was a good idea.

Cordy strolled forward. She had been uncharacteristically quiet. Never a good sign. She opened her mouth. And then closed it. Looked at the others and shook her head. She started again, "Ok, here's the deal. I've said it like fifteen thousand damn times but you are not listening. Stop This Drama." Her voice was unusually even. "We are sick of it. All of us."

Fuck her. This is not about her. "This is not about you."

Her face got red. "Oh that's old hat isn't it? Well screw you O Holy One. In fact, screw all three of you. This is about me. This is about all of us. You three think you are the only ones in this hotel, hell apparently in the world, who have problems." I went to speak and she raised her hand. "That wasn't a question. I don't need an answer from you." I was still going to interrupt but the others' death stares were enough to keep me quiet. "Look at us. Contrary to what you may think, we exist outside of the tragedy that is Buffy and Faith. You are not the only ones that have been in pain. Look around this room. All of us have. Hell Xander even lost an eye. But do you hear us whining? No. Are we sulking around like the two McBroody twins here? No. Wanna fucking know why? Cause we can't. What we are doing is fixing the fucking mess that you have created." Angel started to say something. "Don't. You are just as bad." She shook her head in disgust, "maybe even worse. Willow lost Tara, almost destroyed the world and picked up a slayer. Xander, as I aforementioned, lost an eye. And Anya. Dawn, jeez where do I start huh? Mystical key that unlocks the world scary enough for ya? Or how about being an orphan? And losing a sister, just to get her creepy ass back half a year later? And losing the others…Tara, Anya? And Kennedy, apparently the only slayer in this house with any sense, cause she knows the world is not revolving around her. What about her? She's not moping around 'oh, my calling…blah blah blah.' She just does her fucking job. And me? Well, let's see. For more years than I care to count at this moment, I've been stuck in this hotel with all of this damn whining and pouting and loudass fucking until I want to kill you. I am sick of the drama. Sick of it. You might need to understand what I mean by that. We are prepared to leave. And take Annie with us. Cause you fuck ups have given us more than enough reasons to lock you in this room and never let you out."

Faith growled at her. I spoke first, "Take her and let's see what happens. If you want to leave that's fine." I looked around the room, "All of you. Get out."

Willow walked up, "You know that's typical Buffy. You get your feelings hurt and you lash out. You still think we all play second fiddle to you, don't you? You've never thought any different."

I steadied my breathing, "You know that isn't true." I couldn't control the harshness as easily.

Xander piped up. "The fuck it isn't Buffy. Why do you think we stay around here? Because of the three of you? Give us all a break. We are not that dependent. You are not the center of our life. In fact, if it weren't for Annie, and I'm thinking I'm not speaking for just myself here when I say, we'd have been gone a long time ago."

"…And never looked back." Dawn added.

What was this? I turned to Faith. She looked ashamed. Her face flashed. Ok, and angry. Angel was staring at the ground. A little help here guys. I began to speak.

"Oh, shut up Buffy, no one wants to hear what you have to say." Cordy said.

"Guess not Cordy, when you are always running your big mouth."

"She's right Buffy, shut up." My sister again. Why is she doing this? Why are they all doing this? "She's right. That's why you can't stand it. She's always right." She looked at Cordelia. "Except for the being hotter than me…"She shook her head, "but everything else…well she's beating the rest of us in spades. It makes you sick that she doesn't worship you."

Willow smirked, and looked to Kennedy. "Yeah, apparently she's not as stupid as the rest of us." Well, lookie at Cordy's smug face. Bitch. Willow leaned towards Kennedy, "Probably all should have listened to her." She said under her breath.

I turned to her, "What!?!"

She got closer to me, "I said we should have listened to her." Her eyes were starting to flash. And scare me. Kennedy put her hand on her arm. "Buffy," she was calmer when she spoke. She turned to the others, "Faith…Angel. Fix this shit. Fix it now. Fix it once and for all." She slowed her breathing. "Cause if you don't…well, I'll let you imagine." I saw the flash again. All three of us did. "I'm sick of this. Everyone is sick of this. Your daughter was outside listening to everything earlier. It seemed to me that not a one of you cared enough to do a damn thing about that. Annie has cried to us more than once about not being loved. We lie to her. Tell her her mother's love her. That they put her first. Well what fucking bullshit."

Dawn nodded. "We are old enough to know better. She isn't. And a promise I can make to you big sis is this – any more of this stupid melodramatic theatrics and we are all…and I do mean ALL out of here. Think about that."

God. I didn't even know what to think. I looked to Faith, who was doing the same thing as Angel. Studying her shoes. Great. Glad they're so brave.

I wanted to speak, but any urge I had was shot down by the looks of death I was getting from the five of them. I had never seen all of them mad at me like this before. Well there was the one time…with the First. And they had been wrong. They had. But now…I don't know. I shut my mouth. My shoes were starting to get just as interesting.

They turned around to leave, but stopped. I looked up.

In walked Giles, Annie on his shoulders giggling like it was Christmas. Andrew was behind them.

"Well, there you all are," Giles said brightly. "Andrew here seems to be struck dumb. I was beginning to get concerned."

No one said anything. He looked around the room. Faith was hiding behind the others.

"They were fighting." Annie said.

Giles lowered her and she ran to Cordy. Who promptly picked her up. My heart fell to the floor. She's upset and she doesn't even think about it. It's always to one of them. Even after I've tried to rectify the way I acted when she was born, I don't think it was ever enough.

He looked at each of us. A stern warning on his face. "What does she mean by that?" He turned suddenly, "Faith!" He had just seen her. "My god. What are…when did…"he turned to Willow, "What is going on here?"

Cordelia switched Annie to her hip. Willow had shrugged, so Cordy prepared to answer. "What do you think? You're supposed to be smart."

He took off his glasses, "Well that wasn't very helpful, Cordelia."

He settled on Xander. I could see he was still angry with us. He wasn't masking it well. "It's Buffy and Faith. Volume Two. Packed with more angsty drama for your enjoyment."

He nodded, "I see. Still on that are we?" He looked between us.

I thought of something. "You knew Angel saw her?" I asked him.

He sighed. I felt like a teenager again. "Yes Buffy, I did. But I couldn't rightly tell you, now could I? You don't take to rejection very maturely. And you had moved on. You had Monica." He looked at Faith for a moment, "I'd ask where she was by the way," and shook his head sadly, "but I'm willing to wager I already know the answer to that. As for the other, I had no idea what happened that night he went to her. All I knew was that Faith wasn't coming back. And that she would never forget to take that pill again."

I had no idea what pill he was talking about. It still pissed me off that he had known.

"Oh no," Cordy held up her hand, "use your brain, slayer. What did we just say? Don't start in on him." Annie had her head buried in Cordy's shoulder. She rubbed her back and looked at me. She turned her body and looked at the other two…well I was starting to think of us as culprits, as well. Faith was staring at Cordelia's hand. She was soothing Annie, smoothing down her hair. Faith looked as if she was going to be sick. Cordelia noticed it, "Yes Faith. I see the light has finally come on. I'm glad to see it hadn't blown completely out." She turned to me, "Now you two," she gestured to Angel, "take a lesson from Faithie here. Cause she seems to get what I'm talking about." She began to walk out of the room. My world on her shoulder. Literally. And Annie didn't even give us a cursory glance. I could tell she felt safe with Cordelia when she wrapped her arms tighter around Cordy's neck. The others moved to let her pass. She turned her head around at the door. "And Buffy. Put that freakin lip in. Jeez. That is so unattractive. And way over done. Get a new look." And out she went. Everyone else followed.

Giles stood at the door, "I still don't know what exactly is going on here," He caught each of our eyes separately, "but I don't even think anything they tell me will be surprising. I do know this though, one, two, or more likely, all three of you have done something bloody fucking stupid." He looked at me specifically, "now do something that does surprise me. Find a way to fix this. You three have been through enough apocalypses to know that not everything is the end of the world. Even when you are at the center of it." He shut the door behind him.

I stared at the floor again. Nobody said anything. Well this was a whole new kind of awkward.

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