Chapter Five 

Two weeks had passed with no sign of Faith, and Buffy wasn't surprised. Their last time together had been intense and revealing, and although Buffy was fine with what she had put on display, she knew Faith couldn't say the same. Their relationship was escalating, and no matter how much Faith wanted to deny it, they were in love.

Buffy didn't know what they were going to do. She had no idea how to make it okay for Faith, and she had no clue how to figure it out. All she wanted was to be happy, to bask in the love she'd found and take comfort in it, and know that Faith wanted the same.

She grabbed some money off her dresser and closed the door to her room. She was all fresh and clean, the result of a long hot soak after her workout. She hoped she hadn't broken Kennedy's nose, but she was fairly certain she had.

Kennedy could be considered, if not a best friend, then a close one. Once some time had passed and she had settled into her new powers, she'd become much less obnoxious. She'd stopped pushing at Buffy and questioning her every move and decision, and before too long, she'd actually even begun to pay her a little bit of respect.

As a result Buffy had finally been willing give her a chance, and she found to her surprise that there was a lot to like about Kennedy. She was funny, brave, smart, and she wanted to be the best Slayer ever. Another big plus, the biggest one actually, was that she made Willow happy, and that covered a lot of faults as far as Buffy was concerned.

She went three doors down and knocked quietly. It wasn't long before Willow appeared:

"Hey, Buff. I'm ready and raring."

"Great. How's Kennedy?"

Willow glanced over her shoulder, then back at Buffy:

"She's good. Her nose was broken, but I set it and she's sleeping now. She'll be okay."

"That's good to hear. I hope she knows..."

Willow closed the door and linked her arm with Buffy's as they began walking down the hallway:

"She does. Besides, she said it was her fault. She got distracted and..."

"I still shouldn't have hit her that..."

Willow looked at her then, her face concerned.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

Buffy looked almost startled:

"Huh?"

"Why are you doing the big guilt trip over a sparring accident?"

Before Buffy could answer, Xander came barreling out of his room. They were in his blind spot, so he didn't see them as he headed for the stairs.

Willow called out to him:

"Hey!"

He never even spared them a glance, waving distractedly behind him:

"Sorry, can't talk now. I'm late meeting Buffy and Willow for..."

"Nope, you're right on time, childhood pal of mine."

He spun to face them with a big relieved grin:

"Hey, didn't see you guys there. So I guess you're not mad about me being late."

"Nope, we're running late too, partly because I broke Kennedy's nose."

Xander winced as he hooked his arm with Buffy's free one:

"Gee Buffster, shouldn't you know your own strength by now?"

"You'd think so, but I guess not."

Willow tugged gently on her arm:

"Not your fault, remember?"

Xander's focus was on food:

"So where are we headed? I vote for ‘Joe's Diner'."

"That works for me. Buff?"

"I could eat a club sandwich and fries."

They made it down the stairs still linked, and when they hit the lobby floor, Xander disengaged and gestured at them to be quiet as he looked around. Satisfied that they were alone, he smiled mischievously, dug into his pocket, and dangled a set of keys in front of them.

"Look what I've got!"

Willow couldn't believe it:

"The keys to Giles' car? He gave those to you?"

"Willow, Willow, of course he gave them to me...in the sense that he didn't notice they were missing."

Willow seemed to pale and flush at the same time:

"We can't take the...can we?"

Buffy and Xander each had an arm and were dragging her to the front door. Xander spoke first, followed quickly by Buffy:

"What he doesn't know can't hurt us."

"Come on, Will. Let's get wild!"

There was a noise from down the hall, the sound a squeak that seemed to indicate Giles' office door was opening. They hesitated for a second, and then all three of them ran for their lives, leaping into the shiny red convertible as Xander squealed out of the parking area.

By the time they hit the main drag, they were giggling their heads off.

"Do you think he heard us?"

Buffy leaned forward from the backseat:

"No way, Will. I think we made it free and clear."

"And how about my excellent driving skills during the getaway?"

Buffy laughed and leaned back, feeling better than she had in months. Her friends were home, and the three of them were behaving like irresponsible teenagers. It was just what she needed.

The day was warm and sunny, and they decided to "cruise for chicks" before they went to eat. Willow even did a catcall on a dare from Xander, then turned beet red when they got stopped at the light and the girl walked over to the car and gave her her phone number.

"Better hand it over, Will. You wouldn't want Kennedy finding that in your pocket."

She looked down at the small piece of paper like it was a scorpion, and thrust it at him:

"Take it!"

He did, with a big grin, placing it carefully in his shirt pocket. Buffy couldn't help but express her doubts:

"Xander, how does that number possibly help you? Clearly the girl's gay, she gave it to Will and..."

Xander met her gaze in the rearview mirror:

"Buffster, why does any man climb any mountain? Because it's there. Don't you worry, I'm more than up to the challenge."

"Right...Also, you haven't had a date in three months."

His eye met hers again:

"But I do seem to be collecting me a fine stable of lesbians."

Willow slugged him in the shoulder:

"Hey! We're not things, you know. And maybe we're collecting you, ever think of that?"

"Good point, but since I've always really wanted a harem of ..."

Willow snorted:

"Of women who like women?"

Buffy leaned back again, letting the wind blow through her hair as she sat happily listening to their silly argument.

"Okay, yes, that's a slight problem, but I'm betting I can work around it."

They arrived at "Joe's" just after the lunch rush, and were greeted warmly as they were led to their favorite outdoor table. Their waiter arrived with a Coke for Xander, a root beer for Willow, and Buffy's Diet Coke.

"Do you guys need a minute or are you ready to order?"

Xander was starving, so he made the decision:

"We're ready, Dan. I'll have the deluxe cheeseburger all the way, with fries."

"I'll have the same, only the regular one, no onions or pickles or bacon, extra mustard and cheese, and a salad instead of fries."

Dan smiled, he was more than used to Willow.

"Got it. Buffy?"

"I'll have the club with extra fries, please."

"Okay, it'll be right out."

Then they were alone, and there was no noise until Xander broke the silence by slurping up the last of his Coke with his straw. He let out a soft, muffled belch and then just asked:

"So Buff, are you going to tell us what's wrong?"

"'Wrong'?"

"Yeah, ‘wrong', as in...Willow, definition please."

"Buffy, we know something's going on, so just tell us."

"Well it's not so much that something's going on..."

Dan replaced Xander's drink and was gone in a second.

"It's just Faith and me...me and Faith."

Willow smiled reassuringly:

"Color me unsurprised. So what about you and Faith?"

Xander picked up his glass:

"What she said."

"Well, in the time you guys have been gone, it's gotten a lot more serious."

"What do you mean by ‘serious'? Like me and Kennedy serious?"

Buffy's voice raised an octave or two:

"You mean, ‘married' serious?! No, no to that serious! That's a serious that's way too serious...seriously."

Willow reached over to squeeze her hand:

"Sorry, big gun jump here, so you can stop with the hyperventilating now."

Buffy took a sip of her drink and made herself calm down.

"Okay, well the thing is, it's just way obvious that we're in love, like the whole ‘head over heels' kind of love."

Xander's smile was huge:

"So that's all of the good, right? No downside there except for the part where Faith must hate to admit......Oh."

"Exactly. And things got a little intense the last time we were together. I won't go into all the details, but..."

"No, go ahead. I think you should definitely give us a detailed description of all the details. Don't leave out a thing."

Willow smacked him on the back of the head, hard.

"Ow!"

"Xander, shut up. This is serious."

He looked somewhat chastised:

"You're right, Will. Sorry, Buffy."

She smiled at him and sipped her drink thoughtfully:

"It's okay, I don't really know what I want to say anyway. It's just...We take a step forward, she retreats. She retreats, I go get her, then we take a step forward, and it happens all over again. It's getting frustrating."

"Have you talked to her about it?"

"That's the thing, Will, she doesn't want to hear it. She says she's fine with just being ‘fuck buddies', but I know she's not. And is it so crazy that I'd like to make love with the woman I love, then actually wake up with her in the morning?"

Xander's drink was gone, so he got started on Buffy's:

"I don't think it's crazy, not unless the woman in question is Faith."

Willow jumped in:

"And that is a big part of the problem, Buff. I mean, Faith is...well she's Faith."

Buffy grabbed what was left of her drink from Xander, and finished it off.

"I know that, and I don't really want to change her...not completely. But I can see that she wants more with me, she's just afraid."

Their food arrived as did more drinks, and they dug in. There was no talking for a few minutes and then Xander piped up:

"Buff?"

"Uh-huh?"

"Faith loves you, right?"

"Yes she does, I'm positive about that."

"So I think maybe you have to make her understand just what that means."

"I'm not following."

Willow was clearly agreeing with Xander:

"He's right, Buffy. She is sort of taking you for granted."

"Do you think?"

"She definitely is. Hey, Will..."

"Just take them."

He began plucking all the croutons off of Willow's salad as he glanced at Buffy:

"Faith knows that you love her, and she knows that you'll put up with just about anything from her."

"Well, that was kind of the deal we made."

Bits of croutons flew out of his mouth as Xander laughed:

"But that was before, months before."

"So?"

"Would you please swallow those? You're spraying them all over the place!"

Willow thrust her root beer at him and turned back to Buffy:

"It does seem pretty unrealistic to think that things could stay the same between you forever. So you love her, for sure?"

Buffy laughed:

"Don't sound so surprised. I think I've always had feelings for her."

"I'm not surprised, but it did start off as a purely sexual thing."

Xander leaned across the table, his eye sparkling as he wiggled his eyebrows:

"Of which we would love to hear the details."

This time they both smacked him.

"But that's the thing, I don't think it ever was just sexual, at least not for me. Although I will admit that the ‘sexual' is pretty darn spectacular."

Willow grinned:

"Oh, I can see that. Faith is still like sex on...on..."

"She's like sex on sex, and you are one lucky woman, Buffster."

"Yes I am. After all this time, she's still so...so..."

Willow finished the sentence:

"She's still so ‘Faith'."

"Exactly! Faith is still all ‘Faith' and she's the best lover I've ever had. The things she does, the way she..."

Buffy stopped herself and two heads turned to look at Xander.

"What? I didn't say a word."

Buffy laughed and slid her fries over to him:

"No, but we could actually hear you thinking."

"No fair! Will, you're not supposed to..."

"She doesn't mean ‘actually' for real. You don't need to read your mind to read your mind."

He looked relieved as he dipped the fries in ketchup:

"Well Buffy's the one who brought it up, and how come you can't talk about the sex in front of me?"

Dan arrived with another tray of drinks, clearing the old glasses and making small talk for a couple of minutes. When he left, Buffy picked up right where they'd left off:

"Because you're a guy."

"So?"

"So all you do is think about sex with women."

Willow was nodding her agreement, and Xander was genuinely confused:

"But you guys are gay. You actually have sex with women, so how's that fair?"

"...He's got a point, Buffy."

"Hmm...maybe."

Xander was nothing but eager and earnest:

"Okay, so give it a try. Just pretend I'm one of the girls, one of the gay girls!"

"All right, but I'm warning you..."

"No leering or stupid comments, I promise, Buff."

He leaned forward, his chin resting in his hand as he waited patiently. Buffy looked unsure, but she decided to plow on ahead.

"All right, so the last time we had sex...well she was mad, and that always makes her mad when I know it. So anyway, she wanted to get back in control and she made me beg."

Willow looked alarmed, but she was trying to hide it:

"What do you mean? Like she hurt you?"

"No, nothing like that, Will."

"Oh, okay, good. No beating Faith and turning her into a frog then."

"She just, well she just kept me right on the edge...forever."

"Wow, you must have been..."

"Yeah, I was."

Buffy sipped her drink, then continued on:

"I didn't want to, but finally I couldn't take it anymore, so I begged her. She wasn't being cold exactly, just kind of removed...but then...Well I started coming, I mean I could feel it coming, and I got scared. I knew it was going to be really intense and I wanted her with me."

Willow looked like she understood completely:

"And she didn't..."

"No, that's the thing, it was like she knew what I needed. She reached up and held my hand, you know, fingers entwined at just the right moment. Her face was buried, her tongue was in me and she never even slowed down, but somehow she still knew..."

Xander's chair clattered backwards to the floor as he sprang up.

"Okay then, good talk. I have to....ah...make a call. You two go ahead."

Then he was gone, leaving them staring after him.

"So apparently he's not one of us girls, gay or otherwise."

"Guess not. I think maybe you broke him, Buff."

They laughed until Willow got them back on track:

"So that does seem pretty intense."

"It was. It always is when we're together. She's such a good lover, always giving me just what I need. I've never been this satisfied, but even right after we're done, I want her all over again."

"That sounds great, so what's the real problem?"

Buffy let out a huge sigh.

"Every time something happens, she runs. Like that's going to make any difference."

"So you want her to stop leaving?"

"Yes, but no. I mean, if she has to, she has to. I just want us to take this to the next level, to be in love and then deal with what that means, instead of pretending it doesn't exist."

"Then you have to talk to her about it."

Buffy laughed, but she wasn't happy. She eyed Willow's salad:

"Are you going to finish that?"

"Nope. Trade you for the rest of your sandwich."

They exchanged and began munching in silence.

"So I need to talk to her, don't I?"

"But I think you need to make sure to stay calm."

"I think I can guarantee calmness. It's not like I'm mad at her, I just want things to change a little bit."

Willow struggled to be optimistic:

"It sounds reasonable, but this is Faith were talking about. And ‘reasonable'? Not exactly on the list when I think of the best words to describe her."

"Ah, but I can do reasonable standing on my head."

"True, I have seen many examples of your reasonableness over the years. In fact I'd say I'm positively upbeat about the possibility of your future reasonableness."

Buffy looked at her, her eyebrow quirked in amusement:

"You think I'm gonna go nuts, don't you?"

"Yep, absolutely."

"Me too."

They went back to their food.

"I love this house dressing. It's delicious."

"So's this sandwich. They always toast it just right."

"Uh, Will?"

"Uh-huh?"

"Do you think Xander's ever coming back?"

Willow scanned the area, but there was no sign of him.

"Probably not until we give him the ‘all-clear' signal."

"Which is?"

"Good point. I guess he'll meet us at the car."

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